Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Um... [insert topic changer here!]

Comments on the last post reminded me of how many people still don't get it. Not the commenters-- you all get it just fine! I'm talking about those other people. Yeah, we see you there in the back row. All talking and passing notes during manners class- no wonder you turned out this way!

Let's have a quick refresher.


QUESTIONS THAT ARE OKAY TO ASK:

1) Wow! Who cuts your hair?

2) Where did you get those fabulous shoes?

3) Do you have any kids?


QUESTIONS YOU SHOULD NOT ASK:

1) Why don't you have any kids?

2) Don't you want kids?

3) Don't you like kids?

4) Do you have (lowers voice) infertility issues?


STATEMENTS YOU SHOULD NOT MAKE:

1) All the risks go up after 35, you know.

2) Not everyone is cut out for parenthood.

3) Well, lots of women choose to focus on their careers these days. Very trendy.


JUST PLEASE DON'T:

1) It's a shame. You two would be great parents.

2) Don't worry. You just need to relax.

3) Plenty of people are able to have children after a miscarriage!

4) What are you waiting for?


I've heard all of the above. Yes.

But now I have a great idea for my expansive forehead! A tattoo which will surely silence all those who would pry and give unsolicited advice:


James Frey and I go way back. It's so me, don't you think?

17 Comments:

Blogger Lisa said...

My favorite: "Oh, you say that now, but just you wait!" (In reply to my stating that I don't want children)

2:01 PM  
Blogger Bearette24 said...

Yeah! I wonder how James is doing.

No one is really bugging me about kids yet. My mom said, "We're ready for another one," but that's about it.

3:35 PM  
Blogger Heather B. said...

Your post just reminded me that yesterday while waiting for my 2 hour delayed plane to depart, I went into a bookstore and saw a James Frey book that is apparently #7 on some best sellers list. Then I laughed because it just reminded me that there are so many stupid stupid people in the world.

And as for children, my parents keep hoping that I'll change my mind about not having any. The odds of which are slim to none.

3:55 PM  
Blogger Frema said...

Some people are so tactless. Maybe you could try the following response:

"Nope, no kids, I'd rather have sex on the kitchen floor without worrying about the kids walking in. I like being able to fly to Rome on a moment's notice."

:)

4:14 PM  
Blogger Liz said...

Lisa- that must be annoying. Want to get a matching tattoo?

Bearette- lucky you! I'm lucky, too, in that my mother and mother-in-law keep their opinions to themselves.

HB- I guess people just want to find out what all the fuss was about. And you must get Lisa's line a lot...

Frema- that's the beauty of the tattoo! I don't have to say a word. Unless it's to explain what the letters stand for, over and over and over...

5:24 PM  
Blogger Liz said...

The problem is often the assumptions people make. One of my old social work professors used to say, "Assume makes an ass out of u and me."

It's just such a landmine of a topic, and sometimes there are many painful layers lurking beneath. If information hasn't been shared, don't dig for it. Easy enough, right?

5:27 PM  
Blogger Carolyn said...

What does FTBSITTD stand for?

I feel like an idiot for asking.

I'm sorry people are asking you rude questions. Why they think it's okay, I can't answer.

6:38 PM  
Blogger Carolyn said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

6:39 PM  
Blogger Liz said...

Oh no, don't feel like an idiot. James Frey (author of A Million Little Pieces) has a tattoo of those letters, which reportedly stand for "Fuck This Bullshit, It's Time To Throw Down".

Some of us had joked about the tattoo when the scandal broke.

(I'm not really a tough guy, I just like to play one on the Internet)

6:57 PM  
Blogger Carolyn said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

7:23 PM  
Blogger Carolyn said...

Thanks. I guess I should read the book.

I've heard it's a fine work of fiction.

In fact, I probably would not have heard of it but for the scandal.

7:29 PM  
Blogger Elsa said...

I've heard some of those lines. The one I've heard the most is the one Lisa mentions - "Oh, you say that now, but just you wait!" I want to call up all those people and say "guess what, I'll be 40 this year and I still don't want kids." They'd probably still say "you wait until later, THEN you'll regret it."

I agree with you, some people are tactless.

BTW, I have a big forehead...and there's a tatoo parlor in the town where I work....hmmmmmm - coincidence - I DON'T THINK SO!

8:51 PM  
Blogger verniciousknids said...

It's interesting how it's still automatically assumed that all couples want babies. The world would be a much nicer place if people focussed on improving themselves before making judgement calls about others.

And I'm glad Carolyn asked that question...cos that was mine as well!

1:06 PM  
Blogger Frema said...

I'm a little sad nobody caught my When Harry Met Sally reference. :(

3:03 PM  
Blogger Elsa said...

Frema - I don't remember that line from Harry Met Sally - sorry :( But, if someone else ever uses it, then I'll know - thanks! :-)

6:09 PM  
Blogger Frema said...

It's a slightly edited version of it, from when after Harry and Sally got reaquainted after their bump-in at the bookstore, and Harry asks about what happened to Joe. Then it changes to the scene of them talking at the kitchen table.

I'm really pathetic.

7:22 AM  
Blogger Lisa said...

Frema---I was watching WHMS this weekend and heard that line and went, "Wait a minute! Someone quoted that on Liz's blog recently!" So even though I didn't catch it at the time, I did think of you later.

1:21 PM  

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