Thursday, June 29, 2006

You Are the Dancing Queen! (but I'm not)

I must have mentioned my obsession with dancing before.

I love to dance! And I do, all the time. At home. In my car. At clubs. And weddings.

Not that lack of technical skill has ever stopped me, but I really wish I knew how to do it properly.

Now that The Amazing Race is over, I’ve turned my attentions to the second season of So You Think You Can Dance, which I love and which has transformed my previously boring Wednesday nights into two solid hours of leaping around the family room.

Reaching back into childhood and adolescence, I remember art lessons. I recall playing soccer and swimming many laps as a competitive swimmer. There were a couple years of gymnastics. More than a couple years of piano lessons. I even took trampoline lessons once! Oh yes. Don’t challenge my bouncing skills.

But for some reason my mom never asked me if I wanted to become a hip-hop queen. Or a jazz champ. I would even settle for the “Marginally Good at Waltzing” award.

I do not know how to let a man lead me when I’m dancing with a partner. WHAT DOES THIS MEAN? Control issues? A fear of dancing backwards off a cliff? Am I trying to start a feministic dancing revolution?

My husband is used to it. However, at a recent wedding I danced with another man and I could feel that he was trying to guide me, to make me twirl, or dip, or FOR GOD’S SAKE, JUST LET ME DO SOMETHING. I wanted to oblige him, but my body flatly refused.

In my classes at the gym I’ve noticed that many of the women know things. Like how to hold their fingers in a certain ballerina-way while stretching. Or how to spin around three times in a row without ending up two feet away from where they started. Even some of the men know these things.

THERE IS AN ENTIRE SECRET SOCIETY OF DANCERS AT GOLD’S GYM.

I’ve been able to pick up on some of these secret moves, but there’s only so much I can copy without being obvious. And pathetic. But I am determined, DETERMINED that one day, not only will I have fun dancing, but I will look like I know what I’m doing. There’s just the small matter of getting to that day.

I must also confess that I am in love with the host of So You Think You Can Dance, Cat Deeley. She has the. cutest. accent. ! For example, when she says "Martha", it sounds like "Marther." And just wait until you hear her say "Let's meet our judges!" The amount of cuteness that leaks from your TV when Cat says "judges!" will melt your 6-burner stainless steel Viking range. M is more than a little tired of listening to me repeat everything she says during the commercial breaks.

"You two were dancing fools out there! That was extraordinary! Judges, what did you think?"

Then I point my pretend microphone at M.

M: (sighs tiredly)

I told M that he can have an affair with Cat if he wants to. That's how adorable I think she is. But if I find out she can tap dance, I may have to keep her all to myself.

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10 Comments:

Blogger Bearette24 said...

hee. i remember some guy accused me of leading at the prom once. it's hard not to ;) i never took dancing lessons, either.

2:52 PM  
Blogger Lisa said...

I had 15 years of ballet lessons and 7ish of tap. I know all my positions and am rather proud of my step-ball-change. But I cannot follow a lead or dance in a club! I need some practical dance lessons (and a partner!).

(Oh, and after seven years of gym-class square dancing, I can promenade like a pro!)

3:13 PM  
Blogger Carolyn said...

I can't dance a lick.

I look like I'm having a seizure and no amount of beer can make me drunk enough to think that I can dance.

5:49 PM  
Blogger kj said...

hello liz--

i can relate! I can't lead or follow, but when i don't lose my confidence, i don't care.

you are really funny. good compelling writing. and a good take on the world!

10:04 PM  
Blogger Elsa said...

I enjoy dancing, too. I used to dance a lot more when I was younger. Some of us would go to a club after work on a Thursday or Friday night in Boston and just dance, dance, dance. Good times...good times.

11:30 PM  
Anonymous Bethiclaus said...

My favorite thing about Cat is how, at the beginning of the show, she talks quietly through her introduction and then goes, "welcome to SO YOU THINK YOU CAN DANCE!"

I love that little yell.

10:16 AM  
Anonymous Motherhood Uncensored said...

I watch that show... I was a dancer (ballet) and love it. WAY better than Idol. FOSHO.

8:20 PM  
Blogger verniciousknids said...

One of my fave festivals in Japan is "Awa odori" which is held around Obon time (August) in most parts of the country...everyone dances along the main street and cheers the various groups along. It's so much fun :D

3:08 AM  
Blogger Rude Cactus said...

I'll admit it - I watch the show and I even watched it last year. We will, however, have to agree to disagree about the host. Can't stand her. She just doesn't seem at all interested in being there. A couple weeks ago she sat there and picked at her fingernails while she was interviewing someone.

9:58 PM  
Blogger Liz said...

Bearette & Carolyn- maybe we can all take lessons together. I'll invite Cat Deeley, too.

Lisa- I'd love to see your promenade. Promenading?

KJ- Thanks. :)

Elsa- the nice thing about dancing is you can do it anywhere, anytime you feel like it. So long as you don't mind a few stares and giggles.

Bethi & MU-- shall we start a fan club? Or get matching tattoos?

VK- that does sound like fun! When we go to Japan one day we'll have to go in August.

Chris- I will continue to read your blog in spite of your (completely and utterly wrong) opinion.

3:21 PM  

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