Tuesday, July 11, 2006

I don't know what to make of this

(DISCLAIMER: This post is not for small children, the faint of heart, or Aunt Betty.)


Something terrifying awaited me when I came home from work on Tuesday.

"Hey, look!" my husband said as I entered the kitchen. "It's our daily Victoria's Secret catalog!"




I felt a prickling sensation on the back of my neck, and not just because I know that the Earth's eventual demise will come from overflowing Victoria's Secret landfills and women spontaneously combusting out of their leather demi push-up bras and chain-link thongs.

"Look at this," M said, and the nightmare began.

It's...

It's...

Le-le-le-le...

AAAARGH!!!! I can't even say it! See for yourself:

LEGGINGS! They're back.

Even the ones with stirrup bottoms. EEEEEEEK!

"Didn't see that one coming, did you? HA.
Also, I can see that you're totally jealous of my
Pirates of the Caribbean shirt. Arrrrr, bitches."

If people start wearing those leggings with lace trim again, I will cry upon remembering the five pair that I donated to charity in 1992. Not because I no longer have them, but because I actually wore them. And because now someone else's ankles are itching.

There was more horror to come...

"Guess why I look so surprised?"

"Because I'm wearing socks with my
platform sandals, THAT'S WHY."

And she's not the only one. On the next page was a picture of another model wearing platform sandals with socks, and the caption read, "Oh! Oh! I am, too! IT IS OFFICIALLY A TREND! I AM TRENDY!"

Now I'll admit that there was a time in my life when I wore thick, wool socks with my Birkenstocks and jeans. And I was somewhat proud of this.

Now I am somewhat embarrassed. And I have a feeling that anyone who participates in this latest fashion trend will have to go back in a year and cut the bottoms of all of their pictures to hide the fact that they once WORE ANKLE SOCKS WITH HIGH HEELS.

(Side note: is it a waste of prayer to ask God that the socks never, ever be paired with flip-flops?)

Also trendy, apparently, is wearing tank tops and camisoles over bulky, long-sleeved shirts. Yes. And yes.

I think I need to hide
behind the toilet now...

Alex took one look and started ripping the catalog to shreds. Then he fled in terror. I knew he needed sedatives for thunderstorms, but for the Fall Preview, too?

This is serious.

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10 Comments:

Blogger verniciousknids said...

I empathise with your horror...this is what Japanese girls have been wearing for about 8 months now...it's getting hard to find non-legging stockings nowadays!

Some fashion trends really should not be revisited...EVER ;)

10:32 AM  
Blogger Lisa said...

You need to start visiting Go Fug Yourself. This legging trend has been building for months. As has the socks with sandals and dress shoes.

10:33 AM  
Blogger Liz said...

VK- I'm hoping that the skintight, tapered jeans with ankle zippers and bows stay far, far away.

10:45 AM  
Blogger Bearette24 said...

so cute...alex looking at the catalog!

i have seen women wearing short skirts over leggings here...armageddon's comin'.

in their defense i do like the fun look of '80s fashion ;) but the socks with platform shoes need to go far, far away.

11:41 AM  
Blogger His suzy said...

Do you think I'll be able to avoid this trend by moving to Canada? lol

11:46 AM  
Blogger Liz said...

I don't know, Bearette. I agree that the look is fun, but I don't think it's one I'll ever be able to embrace again. Maybe it just reminds me too much of awkward growing-up years. ;)

Other 80's items I've spotted:

-Spike-heeled leather boots with silver chains.

-Oversized shirts falling off women's shoulders.

- Big hoop earrings

-A black stone-washed denim bomber jacket

11:53 AM  
Blogger Bearette24 said...

oh yeah...the flashdance look!! maybe we'll be seeing lots of ripped sweatshirts soon. oh, and i saw a guy wearing a camp beverly hills shirt the other day!!!

what can i say, i'm just an 80s cheeseball at heart ;)

1:19 PM  
Blogger Frema said...

I saw a woman wearing leggings the other day, but seeing as they looked about twenty years old, I doubt it's because Victoria's Secret brought them back in style.

3:23 PM  
Blogger Lisa said...

The August Elle just came in the mail. One of the fashion spreads is titled "80s Remix."

"Body-conscious leggings and ankle boots provide the building blocks for this fall's 80s-inspired styles. Complete the minimal yet sexy look with a beaded bustier, an oversize sweater, or a touch of lame or leopard."

6:14 PM  
Blogger Elsa said...

This is lunacy! Plus, I just finally threw out all my bazillion leggings that I haven't worn in years, but for some reason, stored in the top shelf of my closet!

BTW, Alex's picture is adorable!!

12:34 AM  

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