Wednesday, September 27, 2006


M took two of my rings to the jeweler today. He's getting one sized and engraved, and he needed the other one to determine what size ring I wear. Do you know your ring size? Maybe this is one of those things I should know, but don't.

Kind of like my parents' ages. I can get within three years of their ages if someone asks me, but I can never for the life of me remember exactly how old they are. A former co-worker once asked me about this and when I said I wasn't sure, she actually gasped. "You don't know how old your parents are?" she asked. Well, it's not that. I have a ballpark idea, I just couldn't tell you with certainty in which year each of them was born. Am I a bad daughter?

Anyhow, I think this person was only asking because she was trying to figure out how old I am, even though she had twice come right out and asked me already. Hey, if she can't remember what I said, is that my fault? And isn't it supposed to be rude to ask people how old they are? She seemed a bit fixated on my age for a while, which bothered me. I've always been sensitive about being the youngest one in the workplace, and her constant comments about it didn't help (M thinks it's only because she was sensitive about being one of the oldest people there. One day I put an end to it by saying, "Sarah, it's funny-- you seem to think about my age a lot more than I do.").

Remember last week, when my belt broke at work? Someone asked me where I bought the new one, and I told her how I'd gone to three different stores because the selection at the first two was a little "young". With rhinestones and studs and butterfly buckles.

"Oh yeah," she laughed. "Like you're so old."

I can't tell you what a strange juxtaposition this is, comments like that standing next to pressures to act my age ("Why don't you have kids? Why are you waiting? Don't put it off too long!").

So which is it? Am I too young, or too old? Maybe this is one of those things you don't really need to determine for yourself, because everyone else does it for you.

I tend to think I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be.

Anyhow, my finger feels very naked today due to the missing rings. Don't laugh when I say that Alex noticed their absence right away. He's very cognizant of the patterns of the household.

Ohmygod... something is DIFFERENT.

Too scary! Must hide!


Blogger His suzy said...

Alex's face is so funny in those pictures! I had to keep myself from laughing out loud, what with being at work and all. lol

And I don't know my ring size either.

10:41 AM  
Blogger verniciousknids said...

People are even more fixated on age here in Japan - it's one of the first questions in conversations!

My ring size is written on the back of the business card where we bought my engagement I guess I know it?!

11:33 AM  
Blogger Heather B. said...

I wear a size 9.

I only remember because it's so large.

Can you sense how awesome I feel about that?

11:39 AM  
Blogger Bearette24 said...

He really does look freaked out...what a tender soul ;)

I think my ring size is 5. I had told D 4 and then i had to wear my engagement ring on my pinky till we had it resized.

VK - i would hate if someone asked me that!!!

11:50 AM  
Blogger Liz said...

I guess I'll find out my ring size tonight when I get home. :)

I just think it's rude to make comments about people's ages, whether they're on the younger or older side. It's just a number. But again, I recognize my sensitivity to this issue. I'm sure lots of people are completely immune to it.

12:36 PM  
Blogger Carolyn said...

I don't know how old my parents are.

And my ring size varies according to my weight, anywhere from a 7 to a 10.

3:25 PM  
Blogger Carolyn said...

Uh-oh, I commented once on how young you look, but that was a compliment. :P

3:26 PM  
Blogger bdogg_mcgee said...

LOL--Alex, you are a hoot as usual!

You know what gets me? The fact that when people ask how old I am, and I tell them, they're like, "Oh, you're still a BABY!" I don't know why it bothers me.

My ring size is a 6. Actually, when it gets colder, it's a 5 3/4, but I keep it at a 6 all the time.

I'm going to be quiet now. Children should be seen and not heard, you know....

3:45 PM  
Blogger Liz said...

Bdogg- that's exactly the kind of comment that bothers me when it's said in a condescending or dismissive way. As though because I'm younger, my _______ (fill in the blank) must not be as good or significant as theirs. Ageism can work both ways, I think, which is why I don't go around announcing my age at work.

Which is 30, if anyone is wondering. ;)

C, don't worry. I could never take offense at any of your comments. :)

4:01 PM  
Blogger Liz said...

I mean, 30 is young! But sometimes people act as though youth is something to be ashamed of.

4:03 PM  
Blogger His suzy said...

I heard someone saying the other day that if you were a certain age, then you were a woman, not a girl. I thought, "I feel like both!" Just try and label me!! lol

5:58 PM  
Blogger kj said...

liz, it took me abit to figure out that is alex' face in the last picture. is it his rear, i ask?hhhmmm. then i get it and i laugh outloud.

my ring size? no clue.

7:42 PM  
Blogger Liz said...

It's just as likely to be his bum, kj. :)

7:46 PM  
Blogger Roxanne said...

I only know my parent's ages when it's the year of a major milestone (like my mom is now 60, but soon will move onto one of those in between ages that I will soon forget). I often forget how old I am and have to do the math. THAT'S when you know you're getting old. I think the reason it seems rude to ask someone their age, is because that same person usually uses that info to make assumptions. If people were just asking out of curiosity (and not out of obsession like your weird co-worker....creepy!), then I think more people would not be offended. I also think that more women nowadays are proud to announce that they have reached the 50 or 60 year milestone. Maybe because they look so "good" (aka: Fake), with all the work they've had done on their body? Don't know. But you're right about the whole ageism thing. When I was in my early 20's and working with people older, I always felt like I wasn't as respected because of my age. Or else it was just my self-esteem issues cropping up again. ;)

10:00 PM  
Blogger Roxanne said...

Next thing you know, we'll be discriminating people because of their ring size.....can you believe how large/small Liz's fingers are?????

10:01 PM  
Blogger Roxanne said...

I would devulge my ring size and age here, but I don't remember either right now. Now where'd that calculator go?

(OK, I'm done commenting now. I'll leave you alone.)

10:02 PM  
Blogger Liz said...

I'm a 5 1/2, everyone. Remember that, because I'll forget and have to ask you.

You know, because I go diamond ring shopping so frequently. ;)

8:55 AM  
Blogger Liz said...

And Roxanne- thank you for exressing what I was feeling so succintly-- "I think the reason it seems rude to ask someone their age is because that same person usually uses that info to make assumptions."

I'll just email my next big idea to you so you can edit it down to one perfect sentence. :D

8:57 AM  
Blogger Reighnie said...

Your dog is so cute!

I don't know my ring size. I think it's somewhere between a 5 and a 6 strangely mom knows it, so she's the one I ask.

I hate the age question too. I hate when they say-you look so'll appeciate it when you are older. I am 30, how much older do I have to be? OH-- or being carded at-- the library. Yep...been there, done that.

10:29 AM  
Blogger Liz said...

R, doesn't everyone get carded at the library? :)

Last year M and I ordered some wine in a restaurant and the waitress said she needed to see some ID. We both reached for our wallets, but she stopped M. "No, that's okay," she said. "I only need to see hers."

The look on M's face... I laughed all night. :D

10:48 AM  
Blogger His suzy said...

Oh my gosh! Even if that's what she thought, it would've been more polite to check both if you were both reaching for them.

But I bet his expression must have been funny! :)

11:32 AM  
Blogger Bearette24 said...

That happened to me & D in Miami...they checked me but not him. Even after I told them I was 30 (31 now).

3:39 PM  
Blogger Suse said...

I'm in love with your dog.

12:44 AM  
Blogger Reighnie said...

LOL! True...good one Liz.

I think His Suzy is right. She should have just checked both.

Ugh, when we were moving my mom helped me and S pick up the uhaul truck and the woman at the counter thought my sweetie was with my mom and that they were my parents!!!!
S was traumatized and so was I.

12:57 AM  
Blogger Liz said...

Suse- do you mind if I don't tell him that? It might go to his head.

R- I would be traumatized, too.

8:32 AM  

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