Tuesday, January 30, 2007

All Things Considered

Right now I'm listening to Eminem's Lose Yourself, and I feel inspired. I love to listen to this song when I run or work out, but it's also perfect for blogging. Who knew?

Opportunity comes once in a lifetime, yo.

I'm also inspired by the suggestions you made on my last post. However, you may be sorry that you participated in the writing prompt exercise.


Dreams:
I can't remember any of my dreams lately. But here's what I wish I could have a nice, long dream about: Colin Firth cooking me a gourmet dinner, complete with copious amounts of lovely, lovely wine. The dinner is eaten on a small table in the middle of a vineyard, covered in white linen and candlelight. We might roll around on the grapes afterward, but you're not invited to that part.


Barstool Story:
It's not really much of a story. We went out for dinner with my friend and her new man (who she thinks might be The One), and afterward M and I went for some wine at the Majestic. There were some loud, obnoxious people behind us who were talking about golf. They kind of sounded like this:

"FUCKING GOLF! FUCK! PAR THREE, FUCKER! FUCKING SAND TRAP! FUCKING FUCKISH BOGEY!"

You get the idea.

If there are two things I couldn't hate more, it's loud, obnoxious people and golf. Anyhow, at some point I turn to my right and see Bogey's left arm swinging toward me as he gesticulates wildly, nearly backhanding me across the face. I startled and might have fallen, FALLEN TO MY DEATH, golf fucker, if my back hadn't been up against a nice, solid wall. I almost stabbed his arm with my fork, but I didn't want to contaminate my hush puppies and rémoulade.


Alex and The Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Scary Kitchen:
Alex is no longer afraid of the kitchen, though we take extreme care not to make any sudden dishwasher-related moves in his presence. He's back to his old tricks, sitting and staring up at the treat jar with a mournful expression that I'm certain he practices while we're at work.


Funny Story From the Past:
When I was around 5 or 6, my mother showed me a Sears catalog page full of fluffy little girl dresses and asked me which one I wanted for Easter Sunday. Inexplicably, I thought the dresses would come exactly as pictured, exactly the same size as they were on the page, and clearly I was much too tall for a four-inch dress. This dilemma was very distressing, but for some reason I couldn't explain it to my mother. So I chose the dress featured in a half-page photo, even though I didn't like it, simply because it seemed to be the biggest.

People, it was dotted navy blue, not a yummy, pastel color like the others, and it came with a vest that had a fake rose on it. It was hideous.

I am still in therapy from the shame of it all.


Goals/Plans for 2007:
I made one New Year's resolution, and only one. It was to make an appointment with an allergy specialist. I am no longer willing to suffer for nine months of the year.

Have I made the appointment yet?

No.

You may all scream FUCKING GOLF! and backhand me now; I deserve it.


Laundry Update:
I did one load of darks, one load of lights, and one load of whites that also had three tan towels thrown in. Can I still call it "whites"? M folded most of it. I use Vanilla & Lavender Tide because it makes me feel like I'm enjoying aromatherapy in a swanky day spa every single day.

Except not really.


Story From My Future:
Tomorrow morning I will get up, go to work, and then come home. I will watch the Top Chef finale, but I won't really be into it because sexy, sexy Sam is gone.

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10 Comments:

Blogger Bearette24 said...

the "golf fucker" bit made me laugh out loud. they sound really annoying!

and i want to roll with colin firth after you guys are finished up :)

9:28 PM  
Blogger Heather B. said...

What is wrong with obnoxious golf people??? Hmmmm?

Also whatever you do please don't tell us who wins the Top Chef finale. PLEASE. I won't find out until tomorrow afternoon. Be kind, even if I am an obnoxious golf person.

9:10 AM  
Blogger Frema said...

I volunteer for a reading program at a local elementary school, and this morning I started a new book with one of my kids. It's called Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day. I had no idea you were referencing a book with your clever post title!

11:10 AM  
Anonymous Betsy said...

I fucking hate golf.

And Colin Firth? Yummmmmmmmmmm. Those chocolate-y eyes, the playful curls, the accent. *sigh*

11:17 AM  
Blogger His suzy said...

I don't know what it is, but I just can't get into Colin Firth.

And make the appointment! You might even be surprised at how simple and easy and painless a solution the doc might have for you. :)

11:19 AM  
Blogger Liz said...

Bearette- he may need to rest a bit first, but I'm happy to pass him on to you.

Heather- obnoxious golfing bloggers are completely different. Plus, you've never tried to backhand me. And I promise I will not say a word about Top Chef...

Frema- it's a classic! :)

Betsy- wanna get in line? You can have him when Bearette is done.

Suzy- you are so right. I know you're right. This is why I can't understand WHY I haven't made an appointment yet. It really may take physical violence.

2:47 PM  
Blogger Carolyn said...

I'm glad you didn't fork the golfer!

4:34 PM  
Blogger Bearette24 said...

please let me know how The Whole World Over is :) i've been meaning to read that.

10:58 AM  
Blogger BabelBabe said...

I am NOT glad you didn't fork the golfer, it would have been only what he deserved.

and i want Colin next. As he begins his descent into white sex slavery at the hands of American women.

that's totally the kind of dream blogging i can get behind. short, sweet, and containing colin firth.

3:10 AM  
Blogger Warrior Knitter said...

LOL! See I knew YOU could make laundry exotic & exciting!

11:17 PM  

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