Thursday, November 08, 2007

Writing Assignment #1:

The Place I Would Least Like to Visit on Summer Vacation

The place I would least like to visit on summer vacation is Las Vegas, Nevada. I’ve never been there, not even once, but I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t like it. This is because Las Vegas is everything I hate, and more.

  • Crowds
  • Gambling
  • Blinking lights
  • Late nights
  • Drunk people
  • Buffet dining
  • Fake Italy

Actually, with the exception of Fake Italy, the above characteristics also apply to The Other Place I Would Least Like to Visit on Summer Vacation, which is a cruise ship. While it’s probably unfair to hate Las Vegas without the benefit of first-hand experience, I am 100% justified in hating cruises because I’ve been on one.

Things I Dislike About Cruises, In Addition to Above Items:

  • Sitting with and therefore being forced to converse with strangers at dinner
  • An extra charge for every God-blessed item or activity you can imagine
  • Drunken, sexually suggestive games that masquerade as “Poolside Activity Hour"
  • Is the floor tilting because I’m on a boat, or because I’ve had three Cosmos?
  • Tiny cabins with no windows
  • Crowded pool

And this is why Las Vegas and a cruise ship are the places I would least like to visit on summer vacation.

Your turn. No fair saying something like, "I would least like to visit South African hyena territory during a prey shortage while wearing bacon socks." I think we can all agree that bacon socks make traveling less enjoyable.

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17 Comments:

Blogger BabelBabe said...

we were separated at birth - you have NAILED my idea of hell. Except maybe make it even worse by adding "Disneyland" in front of "cruise." Puke.

If you ever need a really entertaining read, read David Foster Wallace's essay on cruises, in "A Supposedly Fun Thing I'll Never Do Again." I am not a huge DFW fan but that essay is PERFECT.

3:02 PM  
Blogger Veronica Mitchell said...

I don't want to go on a cruise because cruise ships lack a police force. I find that creepy. I have a dim view of human nature.

Disneyland/world also does not appeal, because of all the extra charges.

3:03 PM  
Blogger Liz said...

babelbabe- hell yes. if there's anything worse than being forced to converse with strangers, it's being forced to converse with strangers wearing Mickey ears.

Veronica- The whole time we were cruising I had the uneasy feeling that criminal conduct was imminent and unstoppable.

4:43 PM  
Blogger Lisa said...

I've been to Las Vegas once, and I have no desire to go back. Ditto for cruise ships. Been there, done that, no need to do it again.

But, then again, my tastes are apparently very suspect because I seem to be the only person on earth who doesn't like Paris or NYC. Admittedly, my judgment of NYC is based on insufficient evidence---I've only really been to Times Square and the train station.

7:17 PM  
Blogger Kay said...

Umm, yeah, that's pretty much Las Vegas in a nutshell. I went there on a business trip in May, and it was everything you described. No culturally redeeming value whatsoever. Sadly, Fake Italy was my favorite part of the entire trip.

I recently went to Seattle, and I have to say that is probably The Place I Would Least Like to Visit on Summer Vacation. It is COLD there, and the sun never shines. Also, there is not much to do. The people are nice, but meh. Nothing to see there. Don't waste your time.

9:55 PM  
Blogger Liz said...

Lisa- One of my worst nightmares has got to be Times Square on New Year's Eve. Oh God. My hands just started trembling.

Kay- I've been interested in visiting Seattle, but persistently cold, sunless locations don't do much for me, either.

9:22 AM  
Blogger His suzy said...

I went on a cruise once and actually thought it was pretty fun, but I was 18 and with my best friend and her family. And because of that, there was no force convo with strangers.

I'm not terribly interested in ever going to Vegas. Although I think the place I'd least like to go to is Florida. (Sorry, Liz!) I don't like beaches and I don't like hot weather, and I'm not particularly interested in taking my chances with the possibility of a hurricane.

11:52 AM  
Blogger Frema said...

Cruises don't do anything for me, either, but I'd be interested in visiting Nevada--not Las Vegas specifically. I hear the mountains are really beautiful.

I have no desire to go to Africa. Too trendy these days.

3:54 PM  
Blogger Liseysmom said...

I've had the unfortunate experience of doing both Las Vegas and the cruise ship thing during the Summer... with small children.

Your assessment is correct! Stay awaaaaaay!!

10:32 AM  
Blogger Bearette24 said...

Vegas doesn't appeal to me much, although I did get married there (just kidding). I guess my big thing w/ travel is, I don't want to go anywhere I need shots for.

Also, short flights (6 hrs or less) are optimal.

2:03 PM  
Blogger TeacherBee said...

A ski lodge is my least favorite vacation destination. If you don't ski, there's not a whole lot else for you to do except drink by a fire.

7:16 AM  
Blogger Suse said...

Wait. They do cruises with a Disney theme?

Good grief you Americans are odd sometimes. Although I must disagree with Kay and say I thought Seattle fabulous. Beautiful scenery, architecture, market, gardens and a bizarre but thoroughly fascinating and hilarious tour of the underground city (Seattle the modern city is built ON TOP OF the old city. They just buried it and started again which just confirms my opinion that you yanks are odd but lovable).

The end.

8:52 PM  
Blogger Liz said...

Suze- It's true.

12:01 PM  
Blogger Liz said...

Suze- It's true.

12:01 PM  
Blogger Caro said...

I'm thinking anyplace in Arizona during the summer is where I would not want to go.

Actually I wouldn't want to visit Arizona in the winter either.

It's just plain one of the ugliest states I've ever seen.

1:06 PM  
Anonymous Betsy said...

Oh, LV and cruises are my idea of hell, as well. As is Branson.

Blech.

2:19 PM  
Blogger TeacherBee said...

Betsy - I laughed out loud at your Branson comment. It is awful, but I have lots of fond memories partying in the summer at the Lake of the Ozarks!

5:14 PM  

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