I'm back! I know, you thought I was dead, huh? But no, I was just off eating cookies and being lazy.
Our travels to Georgia and Florida went flawlessly and honestly, we could not have asked for better traffic conditions. We just zipped along I-95 for hours without a care in the world! It was markedly different from the last time we went to Georgia
at Christmastime, when we hit a snow storm and it took us some SIX HOURS just to get through North Carolina. Boy, that was fun!
Alex was pretty good this time. He still trembles almost non-stop, but it varies from wee shivers to full-on, car-rattling shakes. We tried giving him sedatives once, but all they seemed to do was make his eyes glaze over while he continued to tremble and pant. So- no more sedatives.
He only escaped from his seat belt
a couple of times. We wedged a stadium seat cushion between the two front seats, thereby creating a barrier (albeit a flimsy one) to his desired front seat location. This visual was usually enough to keep him in his place. Is it a sign that your life is lacking something when you and your husband exchange enthusiastic high-fives because you're managed to outsmart a 25-pound dog?
Something to think about.
I stepped in dog shit twice, once at a rest stop and once at a gas station. IS PICKING UP A DOG'S POOP TOO DIFFICULT FOR YOU? Then don't get a dog. This is why I whip out my plastic baggie the instant my dog squats-- I do not for one second want anyone to think that I am that dog owner who thinks it's fine to leave feces all over the place.
The first time I didn't notice I had stepped in it and we were on the highway for several minutes before the smell wafted up. I refused to stop again (once I am on my way, I do not like to be deterred) and instead used most of the Starbucks napkin stash I'd squirrelled away in the glove box to scrape it out of the treads of my Nike. I'm not saying this was pleasant for anyone in the car, but sometimes we must endure. Mike was most impressed that I had both Purell
and scented body spray on hand. I was a Girl Scout, natch.
The second time I noticed before
we got back in the car, and I sat on a filthy curb next to a puddle that smelled suspiciously like regurgitated beer as I used a stick to gouge the poop out. God. I hate people sometimes.
The "shit" theme continued once we arrived at Mike's brother's house in Georgia on Friday evening. We were standing on the driveway chatting with everyone, and decided to let Alex off his leash so he could expend some of his pent-up energy. He was doing a good job of staying on the property, but all of a sudden, he took off across the street. I saw the car's headlights. Mike frantically called to him and sprinted for the street, and all I saw was the big, happy grin on Alex's face as he raced back to us, completely oblivious to the fact that a SUV was about flatten him.
"SHIT!" I screamed, in front of my young niece and nephews.
Luckily, Mike is a fast runner. Luckily, the driver saw him and slammed on the brakes. Disaster was narrowly averted. My heart did not beat again for 24 hours.
Guess what my nephew's new favorite word is? God, but I'm a great aunt.
Even though he almost gave me a heart attack, Alex got a new Chicky for Christmas. Why would we get him a duplicate toy? Well, you tell me:
New, Fresh, Fluffy Chicky:
Old, Stinky, Loved-to-Death Chicky:
If only you could smell that thing through your computer. And yet, I'm pretty sure you wouldn't want to.
Thankfully, Alex loves New, Fresh, Fluffy Chicky and hasn't noticed that Old Chicky now lives on a beautiful country farm known as The Landfill.
So anyway, aside from all the shit, the trip was actually very nice. There were some really wonderful highlights that I'll tell you about another time.
How was your New Year's? You got drunk, didn't you? That's okay, no judgement from me. I'm just jealous because we got Indian take-out and watched an America's Next Top Model marathon until I passed out on the couch at 9:00. Exciting, no?
So let me live vicariously through you- tell me what you did. Or better yet, make something up. I love a good story.
Labels: Dog is Love, Family, Grrr..., Travel