Monday, January 07, 2008

On carpet and stuff

So obviously I haven’t posted my iTunes selections yet. My slow progress has something to do with avoiding my home computer like the plague. It’s such a massive time suck, that thing. I swear that I’ll get on for only a few minutes, and the next thing I know, two hours have passed. I spend enough time on computers at work. I need do more healthy things like, I don’t know, get outside every once in a while to absorb some actual sunlight (while wearing SPF 25 sunblock, of course). (I have to say that in case my dermatologist is reading.) But anyway, I really am working through the song suggestions, albeit slowly.

In two weeks all the carpet on the second floor of our house will be ripped out and the long-awaited hardwood floors will be installed, which means that we have to carry everything that is not Large Furniture Items down two flights of stairs to the rec room. We’ve been taking a few things down every day until D-Day, in hopes of avoiding a last-minute 24-hour marathon of sprinting up and down the stairs.

You know, I always think that Mike and I don’t have a lot of stuff, but we really do. It’s true- your possessions multiply and expand to fill the available space. I think of how empty our house seemed for months after we bought it, as the items we moved from our small apartment were barely enough to fill a couple of rooms. We aren’t pack rats by any means, but definitely have more than we need.

As we were clearing out the office, Mike decided that we didn’t need our utility bills from 2005. I said, are you sure? He said, Very sure. I said, What if we need them? He said, I promise we won't need them. I agreed to shred them, but only after suggesting that we create a line graph to show how the amounts have fluctuated over the past two years. Mike said that would be a strange way to spend a Sunday afternoon. Right! I was totally joking. Ha ha.

I decided that I don’t really need my wedding dress anymore, so we shredded that, too. Just kidding! We didn’t shred it, but I really do wonder why I didn’t just rent a dress, rather than buying one. I wore it for one night, and then it was sent to the cleaners and packed into some specially sealed, air-tight box so it wouldn’t yellow over time. Except that I promptly opened a corner of the box to take a peek, because how could I be sure that it was really my dress in there? So now it’s probably yellow and ruined anyway. What the hell am I going to do with a yellow wedding dress for the rest of my life? It’s been over seven years since my wedding and I haven’t worn it once.


Speaking of dresses, I also have a couple of bridesmaid dresses and- gulp- my prom dress. I've thought about getting rid of them so many times, but as fate would have it, one of them might come in handy!

Mike has been filling in at a high school for the past couple of months because their social worker had to leave abruptly. Recently he was asked to be a chaperone at this year’s prom. I got this email from him:


Will you go to Prom with me?

___ Yes ___ No


I wrote:


OMG! 2kewl! I wud luv 2go 2prom w/u. LOL!


My co-worker said I should hold out a while longer. It's never a good idea to accept a date too early. What if someone better comes along?


Gross confession: Alex vomited on the stairs the other day and for a few minutes I seriously contemplated NOT cleaning it up. Eh, I thought, this carpet will be gone soon. But then I realized that I was a completely disgusting person for even thinking about living with vomit-covered stairs, and I mentally flogged my disgusting self as I went to get a washcloth and the Nature’s Miracle.

Even after I scrubbing for several minutes, I wondered how much vomit remained, lurking there in the fibers. And this is why I hate carpet: it’s like permanent clothing that never goes through the washing machine. I know it feels soft and comfy, I know it’s much easier on the feet than wood or tile. I know you can steam clean it. And yet, I hate it. Especially when it’s carpet that was owned and walked upon by the previous owners. Who knows what potty training souvenirs remain? Who knows if they had a penchant for having sex on the bedroom floor? Who knows if they were the type to leave vomit on the stairs?

I mean, that's disgusting.

Goodbye, carpet. Good riddance.

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Blogger Kay said...

OMG, it's only January and u already have ur prom date?! U suck!! I'm totally jealous. Ur sooooooo lucky!!! Mike iz super hott.

I know what you mean about the computer-taking-over-your-life thing. Last night I spent two and a half hours online looking at ballerina flats and satchel bags. I could have used that time to acutally, like, do something meaningful. Ugh.

12:29 PM  
Blogger BabelBabe said...

i didn't even get around to having my wedding dress boxed up. I mean, why? like one of my sons will wear it? I have contemplated cutting it up and making a quilt out of it or something - it's a very pretty ivory brocade - but is that warped?

i can top your gross - the cat threw up today and I didn't clean it up. because I knew I'd have to fight the dog for it, and i decided to let the dog win. he ate it. yuck. all i had to do was swab the spot with lysol and febreze. SUCH a slacker.

4:09 PM  
Blogger Jonathan said...

Ewww, vomit ...

5:28 PM  
Blogger kj said...

hi liz!! i hope picked up the you-know-what as often as necessary before the carpets came flying off. don't want to be stepping in it, you know...

happy new year to you!


8:31 PM  
Blogger His suzy said...

I used to be more of a pack rat, but moving around more helped me rid myself of that. And once I realized how much I loved having the extra space and less crap, there are probably times now when I don't keep stuff that I probably should. lol

On that note, I would suggest selling or donating your dresses. My guess is that the styles of most, if not all, of them are such that you wouldn't want to wear them to the prom this year. :)

8:34 PM  
Blogger Uncle Phatato said...

You are right to tear that filth up! I wanted to keep our carpet, and we would have, except I kept dribbling orange paint all over it. So, we tore it up...and the owner before us had a greyhound, which are known for peeing, and there were giant brown stains all over the place! It was disgusting... I don't regret having wood floors one bit.

9:32 PM  
Blogger Caro said...

We have carpet in the bedrooms only and i would gladly get rid of it.

I don't even know what closet my old wedding dress is lurking in. We have filled our house with clutter and then some.

I hope your date remembers to get you a corsage for the prom. Don't let him get lucky in the back seat or he'll think you're easy.

2:09 PM  
Blogger Liz said...

Caro- he already knows I'm easy. ;)

2:57 PM  
Blogger R U Serious?? said...

Always a good thing to eliminate crap and move on. Especially old carpet to be replaced with hardwood floors!! Our carpets were HIDING hardwood floors before we realized it!! GRRRRRR!

Two floors is a LONG way to drag stuff but it will be worth it!!

OH, and I'm SURE you look wonderful in yellow!!

2:17 AM  
Anonymous Betsy said...

Be prepared to put out. Isn't that a prom night rule?

9:24 PM  

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