Sunday, October 26, 2008

Chub-Chub

The post title is the latest of many nicknames I've bestowed upon Lion, even though he's not an especially chubby baby (I think he might end up being long and lean like his dad). But he has some chub on his cheeks and chin, and I love to plant them with copious amounts of kisses and coo, "My little chub-chub! Hi, chub-chub! I love my little chub-chub! May I kiss my chub-chub? MWAH! I'm going to eat my chub-chub for my breakfast; yes I am!"

Okay, you can go ahead and throw up now. But I cannot be held responsible for my sickening baby babble- it takes over my brain. When Lion is napping I read the dictionary just to balance things out.

He's been smiling and babbling a lot lately, and he also recognizes Mike and I and lights up when he sees us. This doesn't sound like much, but these small rewards can feel exhilirating. He's no longer a floppy newborn who does little more than eat, poop, and sleep-- he spends more and more time awake and alert, and I can practically hear his brain buzzing as he takes in the world around him.

One night the Lion slept for six hours straight. When I woke up and realized how long it had been, I flew to his room in a panic and woke him up to make sure he was okay. He was fine, just righteously pissed that I had disturbed his slumber. I will definitely not make that mistake again.

I took him to work on Friday afternoon to meet all of my co-workers and he was a hit. He was nice and quiet while we were in the library (what a good library baby!). Everyone exclaimed over his long fingers and his deep blue eyes and his reddish-blond hair and held him and rocked him for two hours, and it was great. But I couldn't wait to get home and have him all to myself again.

He'll be 8 weeks old on Wednesday, and I go back to work the week after Thanksgiving. I've still got a job share lined up, so long as our tanking economy doesn't interfere with our plans. It's possible that my part-time arrangement will make my entire position vulnerable, in which case my boss may tell me that the offer is off the table. I know they can't afford to lose it. At the very least, a hiring freeze means that it will be a while before my library will be able able to hire someone to work the other 20 hours of my position, which means we'll be short-staffed even after I return from maternity leave.

I feel a little bad about that, but I don't feel too bad.

There's also a good possibility that Mike's work contract could get cut from 12 months to nine. This would significantly reduce his income just as mine is being cut in half.

I look around me and feel a certain amount of rage at those who have created this mess. We've been careful. We've never lived above our means. We've planned and saved and worked hard to create what we feel is the best arrangement for our family.

Twelve weeks of unpaid maternity leave and a part-time schedule after that is not too much to ask.

And yet.

I'm certainly not going back full-time unless I have to. If I have to, I will do it and be thankful that I have a job.

But while I love my job, I love a certain little chub-chub even more.



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4 Comments:

Blogger Bearette24 said...

Awww :)

By "those who have created this mess," do you mean Bush?

6:18 PM  
Anonymous Frema said...

You *have* been responsible. I hope everything works out for you and Mike.

(And I love your nickname for Lion!)

2:27 PM  
Blogger BabelBabe said...

I call Terzo "Porks." Motherhood has been known to turn normal women into blithering idiots, at least around their babies....

9:20 PM  
Blogger Caro said...

Call him whatever you want, just not late to dinner. :-)

I hope that things work out financially for you guys. You're right that you've worked hard and done everything right.

Hopefully a new president, no matter who it is, will stimulate the economy.

11:48 PM  

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